Talk Like a Pirate Day

In preparation for Talk Like a Pirate Day tomorrow (September 19th), here are some pickup lines men can use tonight, copied from the “official” web site of this great celebration. Let me know if any of these work … if you survive a night of trying them out.

Top Ten Pickup lines for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day
(In Dave Letterman style)
10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
8. Come on up and see me urchins.
7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
6. I'd love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?
4. How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.
2. Well blow me down?
And the number one pickup line for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day is …
1. Prepare to be boarded.

And in all fairness, here are some pickup lines for the lady pirates to try. I’m sure you’ll have equal success.

Top Ten Pickup Lines for the Lady Pirates

10. What are YOU doing here?
9. Is that a belayin' pin in yer britches, or are ye ... (this one is never completed)
8. Come show me how ye bury yer treasure, lad!
7. So, tell me, why do they call ye, "Cap'n Feathersword?"
6. That's quite a cutlass ye got thar, what ye need is a good scabbard!
5. Aye, I guarantee ye, I've had a twenty percent decrease in me "lice ratio!"
4. I've crushed seventeen men's skulls between me thighs!
3. C'mon, lad, shiver me timbers!
...and the number one Female Pirate Pick-up Line:
1. You. Pants Off. Now!

This year, September 19th is on a Sunday, which gives rise to another thought about this event: do any preachers attempt to speak their sermons like a pirate?

Pass me more of that grog, me hearties! Arr!