Sometimes the main thing we 'feel' in our busy lives is stress. I have watched some of the 9 11 specials today so I can feel a full range of other emotions - fear, panic, sadness, outrage, patriotism, connection and love.
Early in the afternoon I watched as much as I could before reaching an emotional wall. I turned the TV off, took a shower, met a friend for a media-related event, drinks, dinner and music. I got some control of my emotions and had some fun.
When I got back to a TV this evening, I turned on the History Channel and began to watch more of the minute-by-minute special, with footage shot by news photographers, free-lancers and video camera enthusiasts. It seemed that I had steeled myself a bit, didn't cry, wasn't as affected.
Then I saw a scene shot minutes after the second tower fell ... a little girl looks at her mother's camera and says "It's gone. The building isn't there any more."
Tears, my tears. OK, enough. I turned off the TV, wrote this; and now I'm going to bed.
Tomorrow is September 12th. Back to my usual insanity and stress. I had an interesting weekend, with a good mix of sadness and fun. Balance. I hope I can take that balance with me into the week ahead.