Sunday, June 19, 2016

Happy Father's Day

My Dad died fifteen years ago but I think about him a lot.  I think he visits me when I look in the mirror, when I pick up a tool box, when I get pissed off in traffic.  He is floating around my head when I try to solve a problem using logic.  I hear his voice when I speak, especially if the first words out of my mouth are a little soft or mumbled and I’m asked to repeat what I just said.


Dad in his 30s
I see Dad when I open the door for a woman.  I laugh at myself when I lace up my brown round toe dress shoes that look just like his did.  I kind of see his face when I hear a Glenn Miller song (he liked him) or a Frank Sinatra song (he hated him).  Dad’s face comes into view if I make a judgmental comment, although unlike him, I try to refrain from that attitude.  I sense his presence when I think to myself or out loud that I can solve any problem if I try hard enough or long enough. 

For the most part my Dad was a ‘by the book’ and ‘do the right thing’ man and he was very predictable.  Mostly.  Sometimes he would totally surprise me with some off-the-wall comment or action, although I can’t think of an example at this moment.  He often seemed totally indifferent to what was going on in my life but then he’d say something that indicated he was paying a lot of attention.  One example: I wanted to move to a friend’s house in another part of town.  Dad didn’t like the idea but then right before I moved, he told me that he had walked past the house in question (quite a bit out of his way) and determined it was a decent place.  Another example: he didn’t like my taste in music but in the middle of a conversation about something else he asked me I had heard the news that Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham died that week.  What?!  I had no clue he even knew Led Zeppelin was a band.
Me (in my 30s) and Dad (in his 70s)

I don’t have children so I’ll never know what being a Dad really feels like but I have a strong appreciation for the responsibility involved.  My Dad and I had a troubled relationship during my teens and twenties and lived 1200 miles apart after that, so we never had the time or proximity to become adult friends.  I regret that.  But I did and do love him and miss him.  I think he’d like at least some of how my life turned out.

If you’re still in touch with your Dad, see him or call him today.  Don’t wait, do it now!!  Happy Father’s Day.

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